wear your heart openly
by Yui Miyamoto
Summary: [Tokyo Babylon / Gravitation crossover] Subaru meets someone in the park only to find that they have the same outlook on life, only their courses of action were different...


disclaimer: Gravitation and Tokyo Babylon are not mine. I'm just a fan of Subaru's and Ryu's voice actor. (Right…fan. I meant total die-hard. Again and again, I LOVE YOU YAMAGUCHI MITSUO-SAMA! * ahem *) Closer, Every Breathe You Take, and Moonlight Shadow are not mine and they belong to their respective owners.  
  
Tsukikage and her story are the only things that are mine.  
  
Wear your heart openly.  
  
by miyamoto yui  
  
It was already late by the time he stepped out of the tall two-story home, with colors that Hokuto would have liked very much. It had a blue-tile roof with a black, wooden door and white everywhere else. It was your typical Japanese home, but it was very homey when he had gone inside while it was still shining brightly outside.  
  
Now, when he looked at the house, Subaru sighed as he stood there for a moment. He thought, "Behind closed doors, no one really knows what goes on."  
  
He then turned around and walked towards home, but his words weren't open ones. They were reflecting his inner struggle to understand why this girl had stayed in that household for so long. It was no different from his own obligations to his own clan, but what could anyone do in their situation? It was either you died along the way or killed yourself.  
  
A human life was the only thing you had, and to take that away even from yourself from every sense of that phrase killed him inside.  
  
He looked at his gloves and shook his head as he walked the dark streets feeling disillusioned. How could someone feel so alone to the point that they'd take their own life? The girl wasn't crazy, but being one who could see different timelines and had visions, she locked herself in a secret room that no one knew about. She would go there to meditate when she wanted to be alone, but she didn't want to get married. The girl was being forced to marry someone from a good family saying that she was a distant relative, hoping for to be of some use to her family. But she didn't want to pass on her 'gifts'. Afraid of what would happen, she locked herself and starved to death.  
  
She died there waiting for someone to rescue her from her own loneliness, thinking that no one was like her. No one could love someone who was a freak like that.  
  
Subaru had been hired to look through the house to find the room of that fifteen-year-old esper because she was crying, "Find me, find me." And when he did, there was a ghost of a girl sitting in a corner with a worn-out smile. "Who are you?"  
  
"My name is Sumeragi Subaru."  
  
When she touched him, her long, black braid slightly bumped into him as she hugged him. "You are one too, aren't you?"  
  
Holding onto air, but feeling her warmth, he nodded his head. "Yes, there are many like us."  
  
"They were afraid of me." She cried onto him and he could feel actual water droplets stain his clothing.   
  
The tears were real…  
  
"My family kept on saying kind things to me, but I was never let out of the house. They were so afraid of me that I learned to be so scared of looking at my own reflection. It didn't matter, though. No one knew I existed." She hugged him tighter. "Please remember me."  
  
"I will. I promise." He closed his eyes as he took off an ofuda and pointed it to her wrists while chanting.  
  
As she was disappearing, she whispered, "My name was Tsukikage. They never told me my last name."  
  
He smiled at her. "That's a very beautiful name."  
  
"Thank you, Subaru-san."  
  
Instead of walking home, he found himself going towards a park. He sat on some steps and watched a fountain spouting water before him. Taking out the cassette player the family had given him, he took out the tape from the worn, blue player. "No label."  
  
He couldn't help but feel frustrated and confused over her own family's reaction to her. He had taken that cassette player with an upset face, even though he was paid well for the job. The girl died with that cassette player next to her and they tried to make it look like it would be her last request towards him.  
  
He shook his head and told them with tears in his eyes, "You aren't god. You haven't the right to dictate who lives and dies before you."  
  
Subaru pressed the play button and it started to play a familiar song.   
  
"Her name means the 'Moon's shadow'," he commented to himself.   
  
He started to sing along,  
  
"The last that ever she saw him,  
  
Carried away by a moonlight shadow.  
  
He passed on worried and warning,  
  
Carried away by a moonlight shadow.  
  
Lost in a riddle that Saturday night,  
  
Far away on the other side.  
  
He was caught in the middle of a desperate fight  
  
And she couldn't find how to push through…"  
  
"You're pretty good," someone told him as he took off his earphones. Blushing and embarrassed that someone had heard him singing, he nodded his head. "Oh, no…I'm not…but thank you."  
  
The boy, who looked as if he were in early twenties, had a strange pink bunny in his lap as he sat down a few feet away from Subaru. "Why are you singing that here?"  
  
Subaru shook his head. "Someone gave it to me."  
  
The boy sighed as he shook his head as he put the bunny into Subaru's lap. "This is Kumagorou. And he's wondering why you're so sad."  
  
Subaru laughed as he looked at the cute bunny in front of him. For some reason, he didn't think this predicament was so strange. He _had_ been in weirder situations, so why should a man with a pink bunny be any different? And when you had a sister like Hokuto, maybe off-the-wall people was always a part of life.  
  
"Talking to him makes me feel better. Maybe you should try it."  
  
Subaru took the bunny into his hands. "There was a girl that made me think of myself."  
  
For if the tables had been turned, he knew he'd be in the girl's situation.  
  
The boy nodded his head sympathetically as one of his earrings bumped into another one with a 'tink' sound. "Why?"  
  
"I…" Subaru couldn't figure out why the hell he was saying this to a complete stranger in the almost middle of the night, but somehow, his instincts were telling him it was okay. "I felt as trapped as she did. When you're caught between what you want to do and who you should be, but you know that's totally different from what other people want you to be."  
  
The boy sighed as he took his bunny and threw it to Subaru's head. "Kumagorou beam!!"  
  
Subaru swayed from side to side for a moment and blinked his eyes while catching Kumagorou in his arms. "Excuse me?"  
  
With a thoughtful look, the boy said to Subaru, "All that doesn't matter."  
  
Then, he looked towards the ground. "My parents are well-off, but I didn't want to live on their name or their money. I went against them until I got disowned because I wanted to sing."  
  
"You're a singer?" Subaru blinked his eyes, now feeling even more embarrassed, but impressed that this boy was sharing his story with him.  
  
"Yeah. My name's Ryu." The boy nodded as he tilted his head. "And all the people look at me with weird expressions thinking that I'm a little kid who doesn't really know anything about life." He pulled on his clothing, which was a black jumper with sneakers and a white-hooded top. "No one takes me seriously until I sing."  
  
Patting Subaru's shoulder and looking deeply into his eyes, he said, "But I _know_. Whether or not you like it, there will always be moments when you're just completely alone. Those are the times you know that, twisted as it may be, will prove to yourself who you are and what you want to be. Because, only the answers are within you."  
  
Subaru blinked at Ryu again and then he smiled. "I'm doing what my family has done, but I can't get out of it. I'm trying my best to be the best person I can possibly, but I feel like it's just getting harder and harder each day.  
  
"The more I try to reach my goals, the more out of reach they seem. The more I want to help people, the more I feel like I'm shutting myself away at the same time. Do you get what I mean?"  
  
Ryu nodded. "I feel that way whenever I sing. It is the best feeling in the world because people love what you do and you live on what you truly love, but on the other side, it's very lonesome. When you're singing, even in a group, you're the one the people focus on. No one's helping you in what you need to do. They seek in you what they can't do, and you wonder if it's enough."  
  
Then, he smiled. "It'll never be enough."  
  
Subaru wondered why the Ryu smiled at saying his last sentence. It was exactly what he was thinking, but since he wasn't very good at explaining himself, it came out all muddled. Maybe it was because he was used to writing lyrics that he was so good at explaining things.  
  
At that moment, the Ryu impulsively took Subaru's face into his hands and gave him a tender smile with a sparkle in his eyes. "It's wonderful that it'll never be enough because you'll try harder and harder."  
  
"But it will be never-ending," Subaru sighed as the warm hands on his face let go along with his thoughts trying to decipher through the twisted logic.  
  
"That's the beauty of life," the boy answered him while getting up and walking towards the fountain.   
  
Getting on the ledge of the fountain, he faced Subaru. "I'll sing what you just sang right now and show you what I mean."  
  
Subaru nodded his head and attentively looked at the boy before him.  
  
In a moment of smiling like a little kid, Ryu had closed his eyes. Then, he opened eyes.   
  
These eyes were sharp and clear.  
  
They knew exactly what they were doing.  
  
Tapping his foot and holding his hands out, he sang,  
  
"Four a.m. in the morning,  
  
Carried away by a moonlight shadow.  
  
I watched your vision forming,  
  
Carried away by a moonlight shadow.  
  
Stars move slowly in a silvery night,  
  
Far away on the other side.  
  
Will you come to talk to me this night,  
  
But she couldn't find how to push through."  
  
Subaru was so awed that he kept on clapping and shook his head with surprise all over his face. He couldn't say that he could feel what he was singing or that it was just awesome seeing how you felt that the song was just for you.  
  
It was pure magic.  
  
And here was Ryu standing before him, as energetic and childish as before while bowing his head, grinning and holding onto his pink bunny.  
  
"You can do anything, just learn to work within your own system." Ryu laughed. "Mine's pretty messed up as you can tell."  
  
"Why did you come here in the middle of the night?" Subaru asked as he looked at Ryu curiously.  
  
Ryu sighed as he hugged Kumagorou in front of him. "I came here to practice. "  
  
"You're so good at what you do…" Subaru commented.  
  
Ryu shook his head and patted Subaru's heart. "That's why we're doing an okay job, whatever we do, Subaru-kun."  
  
"Every time I do my 'shigoto', I always feel bittersweet. I remember them all, but they won't remember me. And that's okay with me."  
  
"You're doing fine, Subaru-kun," Ryu said while smiling. "The world may tell you to be selfish and keep your heart from being broken, but I don't like that kind of advice. Your heart is the only thing that's going to keep you alive in the end. It's because you can feel other people to the point of empathizing with them that they come to you."  
  
"I saw that when you sang a few sentences, Ryu-san. You wear your heart openly."  
  
Bowing his head, Ryu humbly accepted the compliment.  
  
"I want to be like that someday…" Subaru thought to himself. "I don't want to hide from Hokuto or Seishirou like I usually do when it concerns me telling them how I really feel about people and things around me."  
  
With that, Ryu turned around, but Subaru said, "Thanks!"  
  
Ryu lifted up Kumagorou. "You're welcome! Thank you to you too!"  
  
Subaru then got up and walked home while singing the song to himself, but wondered what Ryu was thanking him for.  
  
--  
  
Two days later, Hokuto was watching some music program as Subaru was walking by. He retraced his steps and leaned forward with his eyes disbelieving what they were seeing.  
  
Seishirou, who was sitting next to Hokuto, and almost touching Subaru's cheek, turned his head and asked, "What's wrong, Subaru-kun?"  
  
Subaru pointed his glove towards the television at the bouncy figure on the screen that transformed into a serious singer. "I met him."  
  
Hokuto grabbed for her brother's collar, "What?! You met Nittle Grasper's singing genius Sakuma Ryuichi-sama?! AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME?!"  
  
"I didn't know who he was!" he protested while a sweatdrop rolled down his cheek.  
  
"I wrote this song after I met someone in the park the other day. I went there because I felt disillusioned. I was practicing thinking that I was losing my touch, but when that person told me what I really needed to hear."  
  
Subaru couldn't believe what he was hearing because that was exactly what he had wanted to say, but couldn't express.  
  
"So, I dedicated this to you, Subaru-kun," Ryu said with a glint in his smile and a wink while waving goodbye to the audience.   
  
Hokuto and Seishirou looked at Subaru with blank stares.   
  
"I'm going to get something to drink before I have a talk with you, Subaru. Hmph!" Hokuto left to go to the kitchen while Seishirou continued to stare at Subaru.  
  
Subaru looked from side to side.   
  
At that moment, Seishirou pulled Subaru onto the couch and embraced him while holding Subaru on his lap. "Now, I'm jealous."  
  
Subaru sat with his eyes blinking at Seishirou.  
  
But as Seishirou ran his fingers through Subaru's hair, he whispered seriously, "Sometimes, I don't know where you are, Subaru. Then, sometimes, when I'm around you, you're so far away. And it makes me jealous thinking if someone or something else knows you more than I do."  
  
Kissing his cheek, he continued, "It took me this long to find you. Do you think I'll ever leave you alone now?"  
  
Subaru closed his eyes pressed his head towards Seishirou's chest. Honestly, he mumbled his fear, "I don't want to be alone ever again."  
  
"Tell me I've made a difference in your life, Seishirou…" he hoped quietly.   
  
Snuggling next to Seishirou, at that moment, he wasn't concerned about Hokuto walking in to see them so affectionate towards one another. He wanted to be a spoiled child.  
  
Even for one moment, like a moon's shadow, he would say what he wanted.  
  
Seishirou replied,  
  
"I promise I won't.  
  
Even when I die."  
  
Then, Seishirou started to smirk as he sang,  
  
"Every breath you take,  
  
Every move you make,  
  
I'll be watching you."  
  
"Isn't that the stalker song?" Hokuto said as she came back and lifted her eyebrow at the scene before her. Shaking her head, she just sat down, took a sip of her tea, and patted Subaru's hair like the caring sister she always was. Sighing, she just continued to watch the television.  
  
"And not just any stalker song. That's the ultimate one. Mmhm." Hokuto nodded to herself and Seishirou smirked even more.  
  
Subaru smiled, but his eyes were still closed, even though his cheeks were burning red.   
  
"You sang the 'ultimate stalker song' to me?" Subaru asked while twitching.  
  
"I can sing something else to you. I've got to outdo that idol of yours now." Seishirou, well, he kind of twitched too. So, he _was_ a little jealous after all.  
  
At that moment, Seishirou really lowered his voice while whispering to Subaru's ear something that made Subaru's mind explode to the point that he turned so red you thought it was his natural face color and kept his lips tightly shut.  
  
Hokuto, wide-eyed, tried asking what the song was, but even Seishirou wouldn't let up and there was no way in hell Subaru was going to share it.   
  
"Hey! Tell me!" she shouted.  
  
Seishirou gestured for Hokuto to come closer to him. "Closer."  
  
When she was next to him, she said, "Well, what was it."  
  
"I just told you."  
  
"What?!"  
  
"Seishirou-san?" Subaru then said, while still shocked at the song sung into his ear. "I'll stick with 'Every Breath You Take'."  
  
Still snuggling his head on his shoulder, Subaru made himself comfortable while pulling on Seishirou's tie. "But isn't stalking kind of obsessive?"  
  
Seishirou answered with an all-knowing smile, enticed by the fact that Subaru was innocently pulling on his tie, "It's a way of life."  
  
"But how about if I stalked you? Wouldn't you feel weird?" Naively, Subaru asked with wide-eyes and half a pout, but happy that they were both with him.  
  
Hokuto shook her head, annoyed at Subaru's innocence that she didn't even want to comment anymore. Years of training him and he was _still_ like this?!  
  
Seishirou looked at him deeply while replying,  
  
"Actually…  
  
I'd find that really cute."  
  
Owari.  
  
--  
  
Author's note: I wanted to do Calendar Boy because I had this image of a raven-haired beauty…Subaru, of course, with all the seriousness and fangirl cravings I have. Then, I thought, "Dammit, I wanna do Ryuichi too!"  
  
I don't know what the hell came out, but this is the result. ^_____^v Notice that the fics this week have been atypical. ^^;;;;; Why am I so weird?  
  
But…yea~! I wanted a cute fic! It was sad at first, but I got the feel I wanted. And to those who _know_ what that last song's lyrics are, you can only imagine what Subaru was thinking, let alone Seishirou. On a serious note, I really like how this came out. It's a bit different from what I do because this was really 'open', but I was focusing on relationships as well as how Tsukikage, Subaru, and Ryuichi are so alike and yet they react very differently to their lives. 


End file.
